Dating in San Antonio can be frustrating for singles

For singles in San Antonio, there doesn’t seem to be much hope for dating in the city.

This sentiment has been expressed repeatedly on social media. A recent example came on March 3, when an anonymous Facebook user took to the Ask a Local page and asked San Antonians why the dating scene in the Alamo City is so bad.

“In the two years since I’ve been here from Ohio, it’s been awful and a headache to say the least,” the participant wrote. “I’ve tried all the apps and the results are the same, fragmentation, time wasters, and the main culprit: terrible communication.”

The dating experience is subjective and varies greatly depending on individual preferences, gender and other factors, says Melanie Shores, director of matchmaking at Modern Mingle, a San Antonio-based matchmaking service. Some people still have positive experiences in the San Antonio dating pool, Shores said, and the dating scene in any city is influenced by many factors and can fluctuate between individuals.

“Also, San Antonio has a lower rate of singles than other major US cities, which may explain some of the challenges,” Shores wrote in an email. “Others cited a limited number of available seats and/or a single related event, which also minimizes options.”

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San Antonio is growing at a faster rate than the vast majority of the country. Those who come to the Alamo City in search of a partner will experience a dating scene unlike the rest of the country. Among those, Shores said, are a family-oriented culture, a large military presence and an emphasis on outdoor activities.

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“San Antonio is known for its rich cultural heritage,” Shores wrote. “This diversity can affect dating patterns and expectations, as different cultural groups have different customs and values ​​about dating and relationships.”

San Antonio’s vibrant food and beverage scene can also provide “interesting and diverse” dating options, Shores added.

But there are several factors that can make San Antonio singles lose faith in the city’s dating scene, from limited options to frequent rejections, from lack of time to online dating fatigue. Vulnerability can also be a challenge for some, as people find it difficult to trust others enough to form meaningful relationships.

“To remedy these feelings, singles may want to try a new approach to dating, such as expanding their social circle,” Shores wrote.

For those who have given up hope on dating in San Antonio, Shores recommends volunteering or joining community organizations to meet people who share similar values ​​and interests. Participating in events and activities, however limited, can also be interesting, including local clubs, groups, and trying new hobbies.

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“Be patient and persevere,” Shores wrote. “Finding a compatible romantic partner can take time and some effort.”

Dating in 2023 may be more difficult and complicated than in previous eras due to the rise of social norms, technology and relationship culture, Shores wrote.

“In the past, people dated within their social circles and often had more traditional gender roles and expectations. Courtship was often more formal and the dating process more structured and deliberate. In contrast, today’s dating culture is characterized by greater individuality, freedom, more fluid gender roles and more emphasis on casual sex and relationships,” Shores noted.

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While dating apps and social media have made it easier to connect with potential partners, they’ve also created new challenges, including romance scams, fake profiles, ghosting, catfishing and misrepresentation, Shores added.

“We believe that dating has become more challenging and complex for the above reasons,” Shores wrote. “The key is to approach dating with an open mind, be proactive, respect others, and communicate honestly and directly.”

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