5 reasons why your partner is “pickpocketing” you
Not making their relationship public is a joint decision between the partners, and the reasons can range from privacy to cultural factors. But there are times when one person does not hesitate to introduce their partner to the world, but the other is not ready and even deliberately tries to hide the relationship, even at the cost of feeling invisible. This toxic dating trend can be frustrating for many who want to be recognized by their partner but end up feeling ignored and neglected. While pocketing for a short period of time is still tolerable, it can ruin a relationship for years. It could also mean that the other person is not taking you seriously, has trust issues, or may even be cheating on you. That’s why it’s important to investigate the truth behind pocketing. (Also Read: Is Your Ex On Social Media? 5 Creative Ways To Stop Them)
“Pocket picking is a concern in any relationship. It occurs when one does not introduce one’s partner to others despite having been dating for a long time,” says Dr. Chandni Tugnait, MD (Alternative Medicine), Psychotherapist, Life Counselor. Business Coach, NLP expert, healer, founder and director – the gateway to healing.
Signs of pickpocketing
While it can be hard to tell if you’re being pickpocketed, some telltale signs can help.
“If your partner talks less about their friends, avoids introducing themselves at social gatherings, or seems reluctant or nervous to take you out with coworkers, it could be a sign that they’re secretly picking pockets. These are obvious red flags that your partner isn’t taking you seriously. relationship, or shy about introducing you to their significant others. People who are relatively quick to introduce close friends and family into their relationships are more direct about what they’re looking for and how the relationship works. On the flip side, according to the equation, those who they consistently avoid meeting someone – even if they genuinely love them – they may feel uncomfortable taking risks and committing to their partnership.Pocketing carries high expectations and almost screams underlying issues in the relationship dynamic, which are often worth examining. Before things get undesired you should discuss things with your partner if you have any suspicions about this destructive behavior. Letting them know how their actions make you feel can be very enlightening,” says Dr. Chandni.
Dr. Chandni lists five common reasons people pick pockets:
1. They are not ready to commit
Some people pick pockets because they are unwilling to commit to a serious relationship or are afraid of making it official. They can enjoy their partner’s company, but still feel comfortable sharing their personal lives with others. They may fear committing too soon and regretting it later.
2. Fear of judgment
Another reason people pick pockets is because they fear judgment from family and friends. They may worry that their loved ones will not approve of their partner for various reasons, such as their religion, race, or socioeconomic status.
3. They see others
Sometimes people can pickpocket their partner because they are seeing other people at the same time. Maybe they don’t want their other partners to find out about their relationship, so they keep it a secret.
4. To avoid conflict
In some cases, people pick pockets because they know that revealing their relationship would cause conflict within their social group or family. For example, someone dating outside of their religion may choose not to tell their parents to avoid an argument.
5. Maintaining control
Pickpocketing someone can be a subtle form of manipulation and control, as it puts power in the hands of the pickpocket. They may want to keep their partners to themselves and not share them with others—a red flag in a relationship that indicates deeper issues around trust and control.
“In a relationship, it’s natural for your partner to want to be recognized publicly and to be included in his life as an equal. The picky partner probably has no malicious intentions, but hides the relationship from those closest to them. This behavior is often unhealthy, as the lack of commitment reflects and can lead to mistrust and insecurity in the relationship. Talk to your partner if you notice signs of pocket picking. Authentic communication goes a long way in building and nurturing relationships,” concludes Dr. Chandni.
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